


Being Polaris

by darkdevas



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa 十神 - 佐藤友哉 | Dangan Ronpa: Togami - Satou Yuuya, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Background Relationships, Basically SDR2 ending switched with THH, Besides the Togami Corp, Gen, He/Him Pronouns for Fujisaki Chihiro, Internalized Homophobia, Internalized Transphobia, One Shot, Spoilers for THH, Togami Byakuya-Centric, Toko and Komaru are mentioned to be dating, Trans Celestia Ludenberg, Trans Female Character, Trans Togami Byakuya, so they were in a simulation, why arent there more polaris tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:21:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29561118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkdevas/pseuds/darkdevas
Summary: SPOILERS FOR THH AND SDR2-- A scenario in which THH's killing game was a simulation and despair is gone. The survivors/blackeneds/victims make up over time. However, Byakuya has a question for Chihiro.(Byakuya/Polaris is MtF and accepts it in this fic. I use He/Him for Chihiro but other headcanons are cool and I respect them!!)
Relationships: Celestia Ludenberg & Togami Byakuya, Fujisaki Chihiro & Celestia Ludenberg & Togami Byakuya, Fujisaki Chihiro & Togami Byakuya
Comments: 5
Kudos: 17





	Being Polaris

**Author's Note:**

> There's very little cussing, "dammit" is said twice. Violence is talked about in the mention of death and Syo's "habit's." Byakuya/Polaris has some internalized transphobia, and her father is also mentioned to be transphobic. Just a reminder you are valid regardless of your gender.  
> This is just a little drabble I wrote quickly because MtF Byakuya is my favorite headcanon, I'm sorry if its bad. Thank you for reading!! :)
> 
> (Also it tends to be harder to realize you're trans than what is mentioned in this fic, Polaris/Byakuya is supposed to have been questioning for awhile but came to the conclusion everyone felt the same way. Take your time if you're questioning yourself, everyone's path is different. :) )

Great. They had survived a killing game, beaten Junko and despair, woken up from the disaster of a program they'd been put in, and discovered that their classmates were alive and well-- waiting for them in a world that had been rebuilt. 

While some of his smaller-minded classmates may be happy about that, Byakuya could still view the whole picture. Just because their class was alive, it didn’t mean that everyone else was. No, humanity had suffered and burned at the hands of despair. The Togami family being killed hadn't been a lie told by Monokuma-- no, that was entirely truthful. 

He still had his power, if not more so from trying to now rebuild it practically on his own. Shinobi was still alive, thankfully, though he'd never admit he was mainly concerned for her as his half-sister rather than as a secretary. 

Others seemed to be moving on also, as months passed. Besides Mukuro, who has automatically been taken into police custody for the assistance of Junko's crimes.

However, despite personal efforts, they were all being forced to engage in forced "healing", which mainly consisted of the victim(s) and blackened being forced to spend time together in an attempt of forgiveness. 

It didn’t matter to Byakuya. Technically he (along with the other "survivors") had won the game. Still, he was forced to cooperate with the others and spend his important time with them. 

He realized quickly, however, that he was being subjected to the same as a blackened. Chihiro switched between meeting with Mondo...and him. 

He understood it would take an idiot to not be able to do so. It wasn’t the best decision, but at the time he was more focused on exposing Syo. He played it off as being bored, of course, however, the existence of a serial killer in their class had perhaps...Made his judgment a little worse.

Byakuya would never tell anyone else this, but after a month of their awkward meetings, he told Chihiro. And, albeit awkwardly, apologized for defacing his body.

Chihiro, who was genuinely becoming stronger now, told Byakuya he couldn't forgive him just yet. That was fine, Byakuya didn't need forgiveness-- he just needed it to be known.

However, a bit later, Chihiro told him that he understood and the awkwardness began to fade. They didn't talk much during their meetings, Chihiro mostly worked on fixing Alter Ego and Byakuya worked on the abundance of work for the Togami Corp.

Something was still bothering him, though. Leftover emotions from Trial 2.

Byakuya had been shocked, as had most of them, with the discovery of Chihiro's gender identity but...Byakuya assumed his thoughts were different than the rest of them.

For a fleeting moment, he had thought that perhaps he wasn't alone in his thoughts, that may be another person felt the same. He was wrong. Chihiro identified as male.

He shouldn't have expected anything else.

Still, though, he didn’t understand why. How could Chihiro take it for granted that he passed as female so easily? Wasn't every AMAB person happier being perceived as female? Chihiro was petite and feminine-- how could he dislike that? It seemed like a dream, almost.

He tried to keep these questions locked away, however, eventually Chihiro seemed to notice.

"Hey...Byakuya? Can I ask you something?"  
"You don’t need to ask for permission,"  
"...Oh. Right. Um. What's wrong? You seem...Weird every time we talk,"  
Byakuya frowned slightly, "Just questions. You do not need to worry about it,"  
"But it involves me?"  
"Yes,"  
"...What are you questioning?"  
"You don't want to know, Chihiro,"  
"I mean...I do. You...Kind of owe me, yeah? I'm always here to listen..."  
Owe him? Dammit, he was right, was he not?  
"Ugh. It's not important,"  
"That's more of a reason to say it..."  
Byakuya shut his book, before looking at Chihiro.  
"You wish to know?"  
"Yeah,"  
"I'm questioning why you dislike being seen as female,"  
"Huh? Oh...I mean, because I'm a guy. And it's more comfortable for a boy to be seen as a boy, right?"  
Byakuya's eyebrows rose slightly, "It is?"  
"...Did you not know that?"  
"I assumed that everyone felt uncomfo-- Nevermind. That's all,"  
Chihiro hesitated, "I mean...Not every male-born person feels comfortable like that,"  
Byakuya raised an eyebrow.  
"Um...Yeah. There are trans people, which are people who identify as the opposite of their sex...And nonbinary people who identify as something other than that,"  
"...I was not aware of that,"  
"Byakuya?"  
"Yes?"  
"...Do you not feel comfortable as male?"  
Byakuya sighed softly, "I have no idea," Dammit, why was he being open? Yes, he owed Chihiro it, but-- Emotions weren’t meant to be seen.  
"...You said that you had to dress like a girl before for your family competition, right?"  
"Yes,"  
"...Did you feel more comfortable like that?"  
Byakuya felt himself freeze. More comfortable? As Polaris he...Had been happier yes, the constant ache of presenting as male had been gone and joy had sparked every time he was called she. However, until now, he had assumed that was But it wasn’t, apparently. Was there something wrong with him? What--

"Byakuya?" Chihiro asked, concern laced in his voice.  
"Ah-- My apologies. I suppose so,"  
"So...Yeah?"  
"Yes,"  
"Um...I'm not an expert on this, but I would talk to Celeste. She...Can help with that more, I think. You're friends with her, right?"

"Yes, I suppose we are," He hadn't considered himself friends with anyone until recently, but apparently that had changed during his actual time at Hope's Peak. The memories were slowly returning, but even besides that he spent time with Celeste. Her presence was more tolerable than most.

"Cool! Um. Yeah. She can help. Anyways...I'm glad you asked me,"  
"Ah, yes. Thank you for listening," Byakuya said, stiffly. Thanking people for emotional reasons was still somewhat awkward. 

Well, it seemed his next course of action was speaking to Celeste.

She came to him a few days later, surprisingly, while he was alone and engaging in his common activity of reading.  
“Ah, Byakuya?”  
“Yes?”  
“Chihiro mentioned you were confused about a topic, he wanted to join the conversation-- though he will be late-- might I be of any assistance?”  
Byakuya looked up from his book, quickly glancing to make sure there were no prying ears around.  
“Chihiro said you would,”  
“It’s about gender, yes?”  
“Did he tell you?”  
“No, it’s just a topic I assumed you’d eventually wonder about,”  
“...Why is that?”  
Celeste stared at him, red eyes unyielding, “I believe that you know why. Regardless, Chihiro believed I might help given I am also transgender,”  
“You are?”  
“Yes. That was why I was...Quite offended at my former name being told during the game,”  
“I hadn’t considered that, to be honest,”  
“I’m not surprised. Did you even know that transgender people were a thing until recently?”  
“I only knew the basic definition and that my father disliked people who identified as it,”  
“It tends to be frowned upon. However, a person is trans due to the fact they have gender dysphoria. Are you aware of what that is?”  
“Yes,”  
“Ah...So you’ve been researching it?”  
Byakuya doesn’t answer.  
“It’s not a bad thing, Byakuya,”  
“I assume it isn’t for you,”  
“...You know, your father isn’t around to pass judgment on you. I know that you are aware of that, given you are changing how you act. You’re trying to be kinder, but you should show that same treatment towards yourself,”  
“I don’t understand,” Byakuya admitted.

“You want to be perfect yet, this is not a form of imperfection. Rather, if you were yourself you’d likely improve,”  
“How so?”  
“For starters, perhaps you’d be able to develop actual confidence,”  
“Ah,”  
“Also, your happiness would improve, you’d be less unhappy with yourself, and while it isn’t a guarantee to joy, perhaps it will help your attitude,”  
“I doubt that somewhat,”  
“I’m assuming you need another opinion?”  
“Perhaps-- Someone is walking towards us,” Byakuya stopped, and the pair remained silent until Chihiro came into view.  
“Hi! I’m so sorry, I wanted to come with Celeste but I had to finish coding something-- How is it going?”  
“Can you confirm that realizing your gender identity is a positive thing?”  
“Oh! Yeah, totally! It’s a lot better! Um, obviously my situation is a bit different but I found it helpful to become myself,”  
“Ah. Alright,”  
“If you do not mind telling, can you clarify what you meant when you mentioned dressing as a female for your family’s competition?”  
“It’s as simple as I’ve mentioned. In order to gain information, and later pose as a detective’s assistant, I had to assume another identity. It seemed like the best idea to pose as female,”  
“So you chose to? Of your own volition?”  
“Yes? Is there an issue with that?”  
“Byakuya, I mean this in a good way...But um, have you...Considered why you chose that?”  
“I tried it once as a sort of test to see if it was a sufficient identity, and I suppose I found it easier,”  
Celeste took a deep breath, “I attempted a similar thing before realizing I was transgender. It was ‘easier’ for me also. Compared to someone who identifies as cisgender, like Chihiro, feeling better as the opposite gender is…How do I put this?”  
“I’m assuming you’re going to say it’s not a regular response?”  
“Yes. You may want to think about the possibility you may not be cisgender,”  
Byakuya sighed, “I’ve thought about it for years. I had assumed it was normal,”  
“Oh? And by that you mean...” Celeste trailed off, and even Chihiro seemed to be intrigued.  
“I...Don’t believe that I’m cisgender. No. I’m not, I suppose,”  
“You don’t need to decide to be certain of now,” Celeste said.  
“No, it’s not necessarily a decision but rather admitting. While I dislike admitting anything that could be considered a flaw by others, if it’s hindering my performance then it may be justified,”  
“It’s not a flaw. However, if that is what makes you feel comfortable with it, then by all means, yes,”

“That’s awesome Byakuya! Um! Do you want to try different pronouns?”  
“I’d prefer she/her,”  
“Do you want that to be private for now?”  
“No, I don’t care about the others knowing, though I suppose I should tell Hiro first,”  
“I doubt that he’ll mind. Fukawa might, however,”  
“Um...Isn’t she dating Makoto’s sister?”  
“Is she? Thank God,” Byakuya sighed.  
“Besides pronouns, are there any other changes? Name, perhaps?”  
“Ah...I’d like to change it, but I’m not sure what I should make it,”  
Chihiro hesitated, “...You could use the name you used when you were younger?”  
Polaris. The name lingering at the edges of his-- her mind and her want. A name from the only time in her life that she had been comfortable with herself.  
Perhaps that would be the first step now, also, to fully become what she wanted to be.  
“...I think that would be a preferred idea,”  
“What was your name, by the way? Or...Is? Sorry--” Chihiro asked.  
She hadn’t spoken it in years, nor heard it since she was 12 and had spoken to Shinobu.  
“Polaris,”  
“That’s quite pretty. It fits you rather well,” Celeste said, offering her opinion.  
“So...She/Her and Polaris! That’s great!”  
“Thank you both. Genuinely. I appreciate it,”  
Chihiro looked taken aback for a moment at the sincerity in Polaris’ voice. However, he soon smiled at the other.  
“I’m glad I could help-- Um, at least some!”  
Celeste nodded, “As am I, Polaris,”

She wasn’t exactly prepared for the bloom of euphoria that erupted in her chest, but it was quite welcome. Now, though figuring out the rest (transition plans, coming out, legal changes) would be difficult, at least she finally felt at home in her brain.

Her father was no longer there to judge her, and she couldn’t remember a time she had felt happier.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!! I also just wanted to say that while I'm not cisgender, I'm not MtF, so if I got anything wrong that should be corrected, please tell me if you'd like! I don't want to offend or make anyone feel bad :)
> 
> I might add more chapters (or just one with Polaris coming out to Hiro) but I'm not sure yet so for now it's a one-shot :)


End file.
